I am 24 and I am a private investigator who specialises in matrimonial cases.

My day typically begins with a call or text from a client with a request.

The opening lines are often rather direct, such as: “Are you able to check on my husband? Because I suspect he’s having an affair.”

She then goes on to describe a range of unreasonable or secretive behaviours, such as the husband repeatedly saying he has to work late, coming home at 3am, or hiding his phone and turning off the location features.

She provides us with a picture of her husband and who she suspects is the third party, and other information we need.

Do they drive or take the bus? What time do they get off work? Where is their workplace?

Work begins once we are able to gather information based on the client’s knowledge of the spouse or whom private investigators call their “subject” of investigation. Let’s say she has seen her husband’s booking for two plane tickets to Kuala Lumpur.

Sometimes, the client asks: “Can you follow him to the airport to see whom he goes with? Because he bought two tickets and I’m not one of the passengers.”

Or if he usually ends work early on Tuesdays – but comes home late – then it becomes suspicious. So we will start from his workplace and follow him to see if he goes to a hotel, or if he takes another woman out for dinner.

Growing up, I used to play investigative computer games, watch TV shows and read fiction books related to crime or solving mysteries. For a long time, becoming a private investigator was a dream. It was not a goal I was working towards.

During the Covid-19 pandemic, activities were restricted indoors, so I spent time watching online videos of people who use their investigative skills for good, such as unearthing scammers.

One method they used is called open-source intelligence (Osint), where they would tap publicly available resources to find, say, a person who is being used as a money mule. I have also tried using this method. That’s how I kept myself busy during the lockdown. I really enjoyed it.

I also watched all kinds of police and detective TV shows, and they struck a chord.

What if there was a spot in this line of work for somebody like me, who was interested or had a passion for investigations?

I had this big dream of investigating and correcting injustices in the world.

Matrimonial cases interest me after I’d learnt about the experiences of some friends who have been cheated on, or family friends whose spouses have had affairs. It was a very personal choice. In Singapore, adultery is not a crime, so a woman cannot call the police if her husband is cheating.

When you think of private investigators, you think of Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass. My friends and family think it’s a very glamorous job. Most people in Singapore are unlikely to come across a private investigator.

I didn’t know the industry existed. After some research, I was able to establish that there are companies and individuals doing investigative work, but the industry is rather small.

Before my last semester in university began, I went for training to get my private investigator’s (PI’s) licence from the Singapore Police Force.

A few weeks later, I applied to several private investigation agencies. I was worried as Singapore’s PI industry is male-dominated.

Would there be a place for not just a woman, but also somebody who is a fresh graduate with no experience?

Once I discovered that Angels Services – an all-women private investigation service – existed, I wrote in.

It was a moment of happiness because you see that not only is there a place for women, but also that the agency believes in providing a service for women by women. To me, their mission is a very powerful message, as helping other women is something I am very passionate about.

When I finally got an interview with Angels Services, it was very exciting. It was the one place that I really wanted to work at. About a month after the interview, they called me to go for training to test whether I had a nose for investigative work. After the training, they said: “Welcome to the team!”

This is my first full-time job after graduating with a psychology degree, and I have been in this job for over two years.

It is a dream come true.

I take videos – not photos – because these provide “damning evidence”, a term I use to describe undeniable evidence.

If I take a video of a client’s husband and another woman walking while holding hands, I can show that they have been doing so for a few seconds. But if I were to take a photo, it is a still frame. So the husband can always deny it happened.

To blend in, I typically dress in a nondescript way, like shorts and T-shirts. So nothing with bright colors and loud patterns. I usually stick to wearing black, white or grey clothing so that if I happen to be seen by the subjects, they will look at me and look away because it will not register that this person is suspicious.

In cases where a man and a woman enter a hotel room alone, that is usually enough evidence in the court to prove they have committed adultery.

But it all depends on what a client wants in a divorce. If a client has a prenuptial agreement, in the case of adultery, a client could get more compensation or alimony afterwards. If the couple have children, the evidence will be used to gain custody of the children.

If the best position to see what is happening is behind a tree, then that’s where I will be. But I also have to be aware of how I would appear to others. In every tailing assignment, we have one person who drives, a person who rides a motorcycle, and another who goes on foot.

I am the one on foot who will follow the subjects into a restaurant, mall or hotel. It’s also my job to follow them onto an MRT train or bus and see where they go.

My colleagues and I brainstorm on how to hide recording devices in ordinary objects like a handheld fan. This makes the device blend into the environment we are in.

One of the most dramatic cases I’ve handled was last year, when I had to follow a client’s husband, who was seeing a massage therapist. After the massage session was over, two colleagues and I followed them by car to a secluded area. It was 2am when we stopped. We turned off the car engine. It was very dark, so the couple couldn’t see that we were in another car parked near theirs.

They came out of their car and went into the back seat. About an hour later, they got out of the back seat. We saw the man carrying a red plastic bag and going to a dustbin.

Then they went back to the car and he drove off to drop the woman home.

It was about 4am by the time we returned to the site. We opened the trash can and found the red plastic bag among some plastic bottles. We had taken a video of him throwing the plastic bag into the bin, so we took another video of what was inside.

There were crumpled-up tissues and wet wipes.

We were a little bit disgusted. But we knew it was foolproof evidence of what they had done, which we could show the client’s lawyer.

I have never been caught by a subject.

But if I do get caught and he asks if I am following him, I will deny it and try to fend him off.

Statistically, it gets very busy towards the last few months of the year, typically September to December. I can’t tell what the reason is. But of course, matrimonial cases surface all-year round.

The job gets tough, especially when I’m half-asleep at 5am and waiting for someone to make a move, which may take hours.

My parents are always concerned that I don’t get enough sleep and if the job will affect my mental health. But they see that the work is very meaningful so they trust that I can handle it.

I don’t think I can chase after people forever. But if I have the choice, I would love to do this job for as long as I am able to. There are very few jobs out there where going through dustbins and crouching behind a garbage dump are part of the work.

It can get a little frustrating. On some days, you get eight hours of action, but on other days, you get 30 minutes of action and seven hours of waiting. The waiting takes a bigger toll on us.

I get to build good relationships with my colleagues, though. The waiting allows us to bond more when we’re on a case. I’ve heard my colleagues’ life stories through and through.

My older colleagues who have been married for 20 years or so tell me that I am going to see a lot of failed or sour relationships in this line of work. I might think this is what life is and what relationships are about. They remind me that what I see daily is not a representation of everybody’s marriages, and to separate myself from what I see.

It means I do have useful advice to give friends who are starting to date – the red flags and suspicious behaviours to look out for.

To do well in the job, the following attributes must come naturally.

• Ability to think five steps ahead
• Ability to think outside the box
• Hypervigilance of one’s surroundings
• Determination
• Empathy

If we are too emotionless, our clients will think we do not care. Empathy is important in building trust because we are strangers to them.

Full-time PIs with a university degree receive a monthly salary that starts from $3,000. It also depends on one’s work experience and competency skill set, among other things.

Sometimes we get bonuses, which are based on the cases. Typically, we go by hourly rates.

For many clients, it’s a very painful process when confronted with the truth, especially when they see their husband being intimate with another woman.

Clients can choose to look at the videos we gather on their own, or have us walk them through the clips, frame by frame.

Some clients break down when they are in our office, and ask if I can be with them when they view the evidence because they think they cannot handle looking at the evidence on their own.

It’s very hard to watch someone you trust betray you.

A big part of the job is knowing how to empathise with the clients and reassure them that we are trying to help with the evidence we get, so they can make better decisions to move on with their lives and get to a better place emotionally.

Some clients specifically request a female PI as a woman is less likely to raise suspicion during an assignment. For instance, if the case requires someone to follow a target into a lift, it would appear less intimidating if a woman were to do so.

I would not say that men cheat more than women and vice versa, but I tend to follow more male subjects.

My favourite part of the job is being contacted by clients some time after their cases are over and they tell me that they have got their lives back together. When they first come to us, they have hit rock bottom or are at the lowest point in their life.

Whatever they decide to do with the evidence, when they tell us they are in a better place, that is what keeps me going. When I see the wider impact of what I do, it makes everything I do, hard or easy, very worth it.

Got an interesting job to share? Write in to us at ssharon@sph.com.sg.